Lakeside

March 07, 2010


I went to Lakeside avec my mum today. For those who don't know, Lakeside is a fat shopping centre in Thurrock, next to the Dartford Tunnel/Bridge if you wanna get all specific. I thought we went just for a general shop because we haven't been shopping in ages, but apparently we were going to try on prom dresses. Normally one would get all excited about this, trying on tons of glam dresses in all shapes and colours, but not me. I haven't been excited about prom in the slightest. Why? Adding hassle of organising prom to already stressful enough cases of coursework and home life isn't a good thought, and I'm SO picky with outfits so I knew it would be a disaster.

Nonetheless mother dearest dragged me into Debenhams, flung dresses in my direction and shoved me in a changing room. They all looked awful. "Nooo course they don't! It's just that you're not used to them that's all." No really, I stuck out in all the wrong places and looked fat in places I never thought I could look fat. I've always been adamant that I would get a long prom dress, but these first ones I tried on didn't look good on me, and the short one did, oh decisions were changing already, not good! I didn't even know what colour I wanted or the style, this was gonna be a longgggg day...

After three more shops and about 500 dresses later I was in a strop, and my strop had put mum in a strop. I hated all the dresses I tried on, no matter how good they looked on the size 6 (might be why) models and had convinced myself that no dresses were gonna look good on me. "Oh so we might as well go home then if you're gonna have a face like that?" Well no mum I want to go and find @EmmaK67's The Tent, The Bucket, and Me first, that's the reason I came here, but then yes we can go home. I was walking 5 paces ahead of mum at this point. "Look there's Jane Norman, let's try this one last shop." Fine. I skulked around the shop, gingerly touching some of the dresses and bypassing most. As I went to leg it out, my mum called me back, "Oh wait look at this one, it's purple." Lovely observation mum, now LET'S GO. "LOUISE! *throws dress on head* Get in that changing room." I pulled the dress over my head, and when it was over my top half, my brain switched from "Fuck prom and everything that's involved with it" to "Jesus Christ get me into that limo PRONTO" I actually gasped as I let the dress drop. I LOVED IT. It fitted my figure nearly perfectly, was a gorgeous colour and the decoration was just right. Naturally I got the 'told you so' look from mum but I didn't care, we bought it there and then for a fifth of the price of my friend's dresses. Bargain!


Now that saga was over, we went to munch in Marks & Spencer's, but wasn't expecting none other than KATIE PRICE to be sitting next to us!!!!! Okay so it wasn't her but Oh em eff gee how much does she want to be her?



Then we went into GAME. Because, er, well, I don't know why, we just did. But I found this. Marvellous.


Our second from last shop was another prom dress shop, just to look. Found two dresses that looked quite nice to went to try them on. "Hallo you alright dahling?!" Oh my god. It was GOK WAN!!!....'s twin. I let the gay Chinese man fondle with my dress when I put it on (I didn't like it) "Ohh you look gorrrrgeouuusssss dahling!" I didn't. So we went to Waterstones where we saw PHIL DANIELS! No really, it WAS Phil Daniels doing a book signing!



I couldn't find my book, which was bad cos I had to go up to a model like man behind the counter and ask him to help me. Shame. As he looked through the shelf it was meant to be on I found it within a minute. Didn't tell him that though, I left him searching...while I watched...

So VOILÀ I have my book, which was totes the best buy of the day. As you were. X

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1 comments

  1. re-reading this right now, just got to the first bucket incident ...

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