Project PerfectFebruary 09, 2012
I went shopping to Westfield with one of my best friends, Gen, last night. Gen is tall, skinny, and blonde *look to camera*. But there was a moment during our spree, and I use that word in the most elasticated term, when she was sighing and mumbling, head deep amongst underwear rails, sifting through to find her size. She couldn't and started moaning at me about having small boobs. (I'll buy her food to make up for this public tit description.)
It was funny, seeing this generically perfect specimen having a proper strop over it, because I've never had that problem. It's the one thing I've never had to worry about. I thought, "Sweet. Now we're even. She doesn't like her small boobs, I don't like my fat hips." But then I thought, "No. That's doesn't make us even at all, because there's nothing to get even about in the first place. Gen looks like Gen, and I look like me. Done."
I'm taking part in Project Perfect, set up by Amy who is rallying together bloggers to divulge in their flaws and express their assets, in order to show everyone that even those who maybe naturally conform to the media notion of 'perfect' aren't so. Also, to prove what should be an obvious point that everyone is totally unique and it's impossible to look the same as someone else. I wonder where this 'perfect look' came from. Who came up with it? I don't get it. It baffles me more that those who try and promote this perfection DON'T EVEN LOOK THAT WAY.
2) You can see the streak of blonde in my hair. I know it's black and white so you can't really tell, but I have blonde highlights and I'm so glad I went back to blonde. My hair's really thick too which, although can cause it to be bolshy and, in both sense of the term, big-headed, I know I'm lucky to have. I've learnt that big hair is good.
3) You can't see the state of my terrible skin! There's a reason why my chin's buried and somehow I managed to look posey instead of hidey. Points to Louise for clever framing.
I frustrate myself constantly by hating on parts of my body. I KNOW I shouldn't give a shit, and I KNOW I look okay, and I KNOW if I tried to look like others then I'd lose who I am, but I still look at myself sometimes and think, "Mate, what is going on with that flab on your hips. I mean really. Sort it out."
So, 3 things I DON'T like about the way I look, but they're just assets in disguise:
1) I stick out in bad places. My hips and my stomach in particular. I'm a size 12, which is fine and pretty average, but I'm fed up of not being about to wear tight fitting dresses. But then if I wore a tight fitting dress, I wouldn't be able to eat or indeed breathe. And food and oxygen are nice.
2) My skin is dreadful. It's getting better, to be fair, but the problem now is scarring. I've tried a gazillion face products, and at the moment the Elemis range and Garnier Exfo-Brusher Wash seem to be helping, along with make-up. All hail make-up. I've also learnt to guide people away from my skin by wearing more eye make-up or lipstick/lipgloss. Enhancing the positives. Anyway, I totally blame hormones for my skin and now I'm 18 it should naturally get better.
3) Hamster. You can't tell in that photo, but I have proper chubby cheeks and I'd rather have a more structured face shape to be fair. But then I'd look, well, structured, which is boring, and I suppose chubby cheeks can be cute.
See, changing your flaws into assets is easy. Your flaws aren't even flaws anyway; they're assets too and make you DIFFERENT. Different is just always promoted as bad, which is so ridiculous. Why on earth would you want to blend in to the crowd? I stare at photos on Facebook of girls all wearing the same types of dresses and heels, adopting the same pose with identical hairstyles and none stand out. I wouldn't want to talk to any one of those girls because they don't look individual. If you want to attract attention, why look the same? Do your own thing, you plum.
I don't usually watch TV shows like How To Look Good Naked, or 10 Years Younger, or Genericise Me (it's only a matter of time), but Gok's Teens: The Naked Truth had me hooked this week. I was meant to be involved in the show during production by interviewing Gok Wan about it, but timing got the better of it and I couldn't. I was gutted at the time, but GOOD GOK (lol) I was kicking myself in frustration after watching because the man's a hero. I want a Gok hug and pep talk. He brought a group of girls to tears after showing them the whole process of a magazine modelling shoot, and essentially told everyone that everything is going to be okay. Everything IS okay.
When you really think about it, you can say so many more good things about your body than bad. Accentuating the 'bad' is just a human condition which when stripped to the bare bones is a load of tosh. Basically we're a bunch of flapjacks who need a bit of perspective and confidence knocked into us. I like me.
I like YOU. You are brilliant. No, you are not perfect. Perfect is boring. Perfect, in an existential meaning, means you have nothing to work on or learn from. But you ARE brilliant, because you can realise you're not perfect. Superficiality is rubbish and I'd much rather focus on flaws in my personality. Flaws in your personality can potentially harm you and others, but what you look like can't.
*scans writing for clichés* Nope. All good.
Please get involved in this. If you blog, take part and write a Project Perfect post. Remember to link it to me too. I want to read about how goddamn hot you are. If you don't blog, just comment below with 3 things you like about the way you look, and 3 things you don't but then turn them into positives. It'll make you feel great, I promise.