29 Jun 2011


Oh ello.

I'm happy! Woop woop, as the kids say. Or something.

'As the kids say' is pretty relevant seeing as I have a mere 72 days of childhood left, before I technically become, what is called, an ADULT. I'm expecting to wake up on the morning of Friday 9th September 2011 still as a 17 year old. But as it hits 8:51am, the time of my first breath, and, let's be honest, the time you all knew that the world would change forever with my existence (yes, even those not yet born. YOUR MUM AND DAD'S SPERM AND EGGS KNEW), pathways of neurons and such will suddenly change in my brain, like train tracks do, and I will officially become an adult. In that moment I will stand up (I'll probably be sitting down) and go up to various girls going "You're not going out dressed like that.", respond to every question, including ones from teachers, with "We'll see.", and leave my class exclaiming, "I have a very important phonecall to make to the bank about my tax return." That is what I'm expecting MIGHT happen, anyway. I'm assuming that flame all (I'm doing this new thing where I'm replacing 'fuck' with 'flame') will happen and I'll carry on being a child, which I intend to do for the majority of my life.

It's hot and sunny! I'm burnt! Hooray! No srsly, my legs up to the middle of my thigh and left half of my face are bright red. It's so bulls. Made the amateur mistake of sunbathing with a skirt on so the top halves of my thighs are white. I look like a magnet. On the plus side (north side?) my burnt skin turns brown usually so I will have summer legs in no time.

Speaking of summer, it's only 24 days until I go to Kos with my best friend. TWENTY FOUR. TWO AND FOUR. TWENTY FIVE MINUS ONE. SIX TIMES FOUR. The tickets arrived in the post yesterday and after flicking through all the sheets of paper, I realised that I have no idea what any of it means. If someone asks for a specific document then we will just have to give them everything and they can take what they need. Nothing's going to go wrong at all, is it? *over the plane tannoy* "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Thank you for travelling this Air China flight. We are cruising at an altitude of 40,000 feet, and will arrive in Hong Kong in approximately 15 hours." ".....oh dear."

I have a potentially brilliant book idea! What? I've said that before? No, honest! This is it! This is THE ONE! I'm going to stick with it this time, because I've actually loved the sound of it for more than two days now. Clearly a winner. If you're not following me on Twitter, then you won't have heard how much I enjoyed HarperCollins. I really really really like the sound of being a book editor, aside from being an author, and had a brilliant talk with one of the main editors on my last day about the role of an author AND editor. So my plan is to write this amazing book of mine, send it to her, sign a contract, and get it published. Simple. Because that's how it works, right? Right?

Blog, I just want to say that I do love you dearly and can we possibly our differences behind us? Oh there there, web log, don't cry. I know it's been tough recently for BOTH of us, but everything's fine now! Look, even Chris Floyd has done a fab 140 Characters project, where 'The' people of Twitter have said why the site's so ace. We're cool now, you and me. :) See, there's even an emoticon to express our happiness. *shoulder nudge* LET'S GO EAT SOME SPAG BOL. X


  1. I wish to claim responsibility for the spag bol; if I had not dragged #Janice out for lunch, it would have just been bol - so there :)